A Purposeful Life

In March 2020, fleeing my home was the only option, moving in with a new friend I had known for a very short amount of time and unknowingly, the new friend was a Covid’19 carrier. Consequently, I caught covid’19 for a week, which just meant that I fell asleep for a few days and then violently vomited for 24 hours.

Without understanding what was going on in the World, this crazy virus, which meant really nothing to me, I signed up to a church set up charity, which meant I would be collecting and delivering prescriptions and shopping. After I had quarantined and moved into a rented flat by myself (thankfully), that was my mission. I was on sick leave at this point for a month, returning to teaching was weird, I had to use ‘MS Teams to teach 5 to 6 year olds, but wait… there were the parents and their siblings watching me, judging me! Thankfully, online teaching went OK, it meant I had a little time during the day to queue up at the different chemists, collect the prescriptions (wearing gloves – what was that all about?), buying random items that I have never bought in my life, and deliver them to different vulnerable people. These people were so grateful that they didn’t need to go out, they were so fearful, there was an invisible green gas (in my imagination), floating around and pulsating through people’s bodies, causing them to become really poorly. I had absolutely no fear; I did not understand why people were so fearful.

Please remember, I had just fled from home the previous month because of an incomprehensible amount of fear. Covid’19 fear was nothing to me – but people were so fearful.

I was and still am so thankful to be breathing and alive; things could have been so different.

The prescription runs, shopping runs and online teaching went on for a good few months, people continued to be fearful of this invisible green gas (covid’19) and grateful for what I was doing, they offered me money, which I gave to the church charities, and a cup of tea once this was all over (never had that!) Rules relaxed, I was allowed, as a Year 1 teacher to go back to work, I taught a longer school day to give parents more time to catch up on their work they had missed due to home learning, but I taught a class full of children how to relax through yoga and plenty of outside time together.

It was weird – people started wearing masks. I have mask phobia, literally can’t cope if people wear a fancy dress mask and I have to tell them to take it off because it hides 70% of their communication (facial expressions and body language). I hated people wearing masks at work; I reluctantly wore a visor but took it off when no adults were around. So claustrophobic.

In the summer of 2020, all had calmed down a lot, it was nice to have a break, but then Lateral Flow Tests were made compulsory for education staff, EURGH! It still makes me gag and cry twice every week. More people were wearing dreaded masks, my head was down – I did not make eye contact. We went back to school in September, people were still wearing masks and fearful, even more fearful – but why? Because no one understood what was really going on. I taught a new cohort, we had a great time, I taught my children are helped my colleagues to relax a little and be happy – to breathe and be grateful for what we have.

Christmas came, what about all the people who did not have people around them? All the people who had no food, nowhere to live? No one who loved them? RING RING – Can I please help with the homeless this Christmas? Southampton City Council put me in touch with 100 or so volunteers called ‘Southampton Sunday Lunch Project’. Finally, after all those years of not been allowed to volunteer and being punished if I was not at home, I could help! Most Sundays from the Sunday after Christmas, I volunteered to help make food, make a cup of coffee (usually with 3 sugars and plenty of milk please love), people are very vulnerable, some are alcohol and drug dependent, some have no teeth, some are homeless living in the forest.

Track and trace is done, temperature is taken, no questions are asked, we listen to their woes, give them clothes and PLENTY of food. Masks are worn, people used to just take the food away until June, now they can sit inside (socially distanced), they can relax and talk (through their masks), to their fellow friends. Us (volunteers), love to see more people being fed, listening to their woes, and trying to make their lives more comfortable. Within weeks, I volunteered to make business cards for SSLP, to give to people on the streets who I say hey to. Within months, I had become a leader of 1 week every 7, then was supporting other teams – I love this, to help is to have purpose in this world.

Meanwhile, I had longed to have a dog for years; I hadn’t been allowed a dog.

My mum had read a novel, which told her about ‘Cinnamon Trust’, so I signed on providing 4 references, then I had to send them a gentle reminder that I was still looking to help. Days later, I was given a beautiful dog to walk, I walk him because his Daddy went to Heaven and his Mummy is disabled. I’m a full time passionate (workaholic) teacher, it wouldn’t be right for a dog to be left all day at home whilst I work. A few volunteers walk my foster doggy, I am blessed to walk this little boy 2 to 3 times a week – he is wonderful.

In June 2021, I became the humble owner of my own house – people are not as fearful, more people respond when I smile to them on the streets and say hey! I do not have to wear a mask if I choose not to. I wash my hands so much, insured that all the staff at my school had both vaccines if they wanted to by phoning up the doctors and pleading with them in March, Lateral Flow Tests are still being done. Life is getting easier; the fear is calming; the invisible green gas is still there but less of an issue. When I can go to church, when not doing SSLP, I’ll be able to sing in church.

I hope that the ‘green gas’ has helped people realise that life is precious, families are essential, friends are appreciated, love thy neighbour and be grateful for the freedom to breathe.

By Becky